What TIES Parents are Saying
"Suddenly we had a son who was 2.5 years old and finding his words, his independence and his stubbornness. At the same time, we had a 6-month old daughter at home and our son was starting to show signs of jealousy. Nothing that was happening was out of the ordinary or a cause for concern but we needed a way to handle our son’s behavior consistently and peacefully. We didn’t want to yell, we didn’t want to be frustrated and we needed a way to help our son through this new world of being a big brother.
The idea of giving up two nights a week and finding someone to take care of our daughter while we attended TIES was daunting. Really, it was the biggest hurdle in our decision to join TIES. But, in the end we figured not only will we find a better, consistent way to parent our son, we will be more equipped to use these techniques as our daughter gets older.
Our son’s aggression toward his sister has almost stopped. Our patience is longer and it doesn’t feel like he is trying to push every button all the time. We have a level set our expectations and find that the outbursts are shorter. He’s a toddler, he’s learning his way and is going to have big reactions to things, that’s life. We now have tools to help him when something happens and help us not become frustrated.
The opportunity to practice our skills in the classroom at TIES is the thing that sets this program apart. Instead of just learning the techniques and going home to figure it out on your own, you get to practice every time you go to TIES. The consistent use of the tools is huge, plus you get to see other parents using the tools and see how they work.
The first couple of days were an adjustment for our son and I wasn’t sure how things would go. After a few days he starting asking to go to TIES every day. He was singing the songs from TIES at home, talking about the different rooms, and telling us about the different toys they play with. Our son loves TIES. He has enjoyed playing with kids that aren’t at daycare with him. The skills that the kids practice at TIES are great. He gets to work on his fine motor skills, his group interactions, art, and social skills. Watching him grow and develop in these areas has been awesome." TIES Parent - Fall 2017
I would recommend every parent to go through this program. It’s a commitment but it’s worth it."
"Our biggest hesitation when considering the TIES program was what seemed like "giving up" two nights a week. It certainly required commitment, which was an important lesson in prioritizing my child's emotional and social needs as well as his physical needs. Through the program, we were able to address my son's behavior problems, but the best part has been watching him learn and grow. This morning over breakfast, he spontaneously started listing the "rules": Keep hands and feet to myself; Follow directions; Use walking feet; and so on. I went from feeling exhausted, embarrassed and overwhelmed by my son's behavior to being proud of how he's thrived once given a structure for good behavior that he understands.
As recently divorced parents, participating in the program together gave my son's father and I the tools to communicate with our son consistently. It also provided a regular, neutral space for us to talk about how we were parenting him and what behaviors we were observing from him at our respective homes. The time we spent focused on being better parents helped our family in an immediate sense, but also set the foundation for a positive, cooperative co-parenting relationship." TIES parent - Fall 2017
"I never thought I would need any extra coaching when it came to how to interact with my children. I am proud of the fact that I am a hands on, involved, loving parent. What could I possibly need help with? I am doing everything right or so I thought. What I didn't understand is that not all children respond to parenting styles the same way and how important is was for me and my husband to be on the same page and show consistency. I have two little boys who I love very much and are very bright, but they were proving to be a bit more of a challenge than my husband and I expected at such a young age.
Our youngest son was continually acting out and being disrespectful at home and at school. I felt we had tried everything we could to get him to make the right choices and nothing seemed to work. I felt sad, embarrassed and frustrated. This wasn't what I wanted to feel as a parent and I didn't want my child to see my having these emotions about him.
Our school suggested the TIES program. I admit I was hesitant at first. What could this program possibly teach me that I don't already know? The program became a relief for me. Seeing and talking with other families experiencing similar issues made me feel so much better, that I wasn't out on an island. The case managers are wonderful young ladies who truly care about the families they serve.
Our children also enjoyed their time at TIES, which is important because it is a time commitment. Seeing them enjoy a program they were learning from made all the difference from me. But most importantly we were given different tools and education we use every day at home. Our children are responding to our new approaches and they want to make the right choices. My husband and I agree on how we handle situations as they arise and we address situations the same way. We continually acknowledge all the things our kids are doing right, rather than the things they are doing wrong. Our children want to hear this praise and I didn't realize how often we need to provide this praise to them.
This has made a world of difference in our household. I would suggest this program to anyone needing help. You will walk away standing a little taller and you will feel a weight off your shoulders. Thank you TIES for all the help you have provided my family." -TIES Parent (Spring 2017)
"Before attending TIES I found it difficult to be around my youngest child. Often without reason, She would have 45 minute temper tantrums; everything we tried failed. As a parent I felt hopeless and like a failure. These tantrums made it difficult to enjoy my time with my family. Our family physician recommended TIES at St. Luke's after she had a meltdown in his office. After meeting with the staff members at TIES the choice to start the program was an easy one. The TIES program is amazing and has truly benefited our family. The techniques taught are easy to use in everyday situations and as a parent allows you to focus on the positives rather than the negatives. I now am more confident in my ability to parent and found that the simplest of changes can go a long way. The staff at TIES are amazing and very supportive, without them I would still be lost. Thank you to the staff at TIES for supporting us and always being positive during difficult times. You are the BEST!" -TIES parent (Summer 2016)
"6 months ago my husband and I were struggling with my 4 year old son's aggression issues and we didn't know where to turn. The "conventional" methods of punishment didn't seem to be getting us anywhere. We tried taking things away and time outs, but that only made him get more angry and physical. My arms were covered in bruises from the biting and punching, and he frequently had his older sister in tears with the hitting and hair pulling. We had resorted to a lot of yelling in an attempt to get him to listen, which just ended up making everyone miserable. We didn't understand how a child could be sweet and well mannered at school, but out of control at home. We didn't know what to do or where to turn for help.
All of that changed the day I learned about TIES. They came to a mom's group that I attend to talk about their program. I knew it was exactly what we had been looking for. We enrolled our family in the program this Spring.
From the first day of class I knew that finding this program was going to be a huge blessing in all of our lives. It didn't take us long in the program to come to the realization that all of those "conventional" methods of parenting that we had been relying on had played a large part in our son's negative behaviors. Through Ties we learned any entirely new way to parent, one in which your focus is placed on rewarding all of the good in your child. We had always thought that as parents you need to punish the bad, but we had never thought to take the time and give attention to all of those moments of good behavior. We noticed an immediate positive response in our son when we began focusing on the many things he was doing right, and ignoring those negative behaviors we were struggling with. Soon we began to see those negative behaviors become less and less. We still have the occasional preschool outburst, but because of the Ties program they are a rare occurrence. What's even more important, we learned the right way to deal with those behaviors if they do occur. We learned that as parents our job is to remain calm, and by doing so it really helps to prevent those behaviors from escalating to a situation where things become out of control. We learned countless invaluable lessons during our time at Ties, but the most important is to remain calm when our son has a moment of acting out. Our children are little people with big emotions, and it's our job to model how they should be behaving. That was something that we were not doing well before Ties came into our lives. We also spend more time now looking at all of the good things that our children do, because kids thrive on praise and positive reinforcement for their actions.
I cannot tell you enough how grateful we are to have been able to take part in the Ties program. Because of your program and the amazing people we worked with there, our family and our lives are so much happier. I can't say enough about the program and I can't say enough about all of the Ties staff for all of the work that they do for their families each and every class. They care about every family that walks through their doors, and in doing so they change lives in the most amazing ways. The support, encouragement, and understanding that they provided to us will never be forgotten. Thank you so much, from the bottom of our hearts." TIES Parent (Summer 2016)
"Thank you so much for all you have done for my family. I believe we are all much happier in many ways because of TIES and all of your support. I will miss all of you and the positive environment of TIES. I have learned so much and feel so much more confident as a parent and I can't thank you enough! Thank you for also always making (TIES child) and I feel so welcomed. TIES is an excellent program that EVERY parent needs! I will do my best to send them your way! Thanks again!" - TIES parent (June, 2014)
"My child has shown a lot of improvement, and is listening better. He has shown a lot less destruction, better listening skills. I feel more confident in dealing with (TIES child) as well." - TIES Parent (January, 2010)
"Before TIES I felt like nothing I did was working. It made me feel like I wasn't a good mother because I couldn't control my own son. Now that I have been attending TIES I feel more confident about myself and being a mother. I know we still have a long road ahead of me, but now I have the confidence to take that long road." - TIES Parent (June, 2009)
"I am so grateful I found TIES. Wow what a great boy I have! I now have the life I wanted with my son and family. I am loving it! We've come a long way, thank goodness I committed to TIES." - TIES Parent (October, 2009)
"The time has gone quickly! I feel that I have the ability to be more objective and I can look at child development more. I have a considerable amount of work to continue with but I feel much more confident. I look forward to the relationship between (TIES child) and I to grow!" - TIES Parent (September, 2009)
"TIES is a very uplifting and positive experience for the entire family. We look forward to the class each week. When I miss a day, I feel bummed out. I recommend this program to ALL parents." - TIES Parent (June 2009)
"Before TIES I felt like I was a good parent. Going through I realize my focus on the negatives was enabling my daughter to continue those types of behaviors. We haven't had a tantrum in weeks, and overall our house is a much more loving and positive environment. Thank you TIES!" - TIES Parent (January 2010)
"Wow! What a difference 6-8 weeks makes! I have made it through two home interventions for improving (TIES Child)'s behavior and they worked nicely. I feel much better about how I come across as a parent and my communication style is much better - more positive and patient." - TIES Parent (March 2010)
"Thanks for being SO positive and upbeat and helping us all hang in there and showing us how using simple techniques can help us communicate and enjoy our children more. Our family has grown thanks to you. Keep up the great work!" - TIES Parent (July 2010)
"Wow what a change that has happened in our house. It has been amazing. I am so thankful to have gone through this program. It truly has been life changing." - TIES Parent (July 2010)